“How much are the oranges?” I asked as I took one and started to observe one of the vendor’s oranges.
“Ten pesos each, sir,” he replied, taking a plastic bag and was handing it over to me.
I gradually took the bag and began on my quest to search for three perfect oranges. As I grasp one orange, I can feel its smooth surface with its citric scent running under my sensitive nostrils. While my hand traveled to its sphere face, I wondered if she would like the gifts I bought for her. Then I took one again and placed it on the bag that the vendor handed over me.
As I grabbed the last orange, I noticed that there was an apple on the other corner. I took one and then asked the vendor who was watching the store.
“Uh, sir, how ‘bout the apples,” I inquired as I look at the merchant, “How much are they?”
“Ten pesos also, sir,” answered the man as he smiles at me.
As the man went back to his table, I placed two apples in the bag and paid it. I took Harrison road and began to conceptualize on what to say and do in front of her. I slowly walked on the pavement and imagine every situation that can happen when I would face her. I gripped my notebook on my right and felt a hard cardboard-like texture that was covering my notebook. I stared at the sidewalk as I give my every step. My sweat was gradually traveling to my forehead then went down to my cheek and fell down from my dry chin. I didn’t dare on wiping it for I was to indulge in contemplating on what to say in front of the woman I love. I didn’t even realize that I was in front of the University. The guard was somehow looking at me.
Why? I asked myself. Is there something wrong on with what I’m wearing? I know! Yes, I know, I look ridiculous on with what I am wearing. I look too nerdy on a blue long sleeve polo shirt with faded jeans and blue Chuck Taylor’s on. Yes, I know, I am weird! All I need right now is some pair glasses and I am good to go as a frigging nerd!
Then, I felt an urge to check my things before I could enter UC. I stopped in front of Gate 5 and opened my notebook, where my gifts were.
Poems; check, love letters; check, I whispered to myself as I turn to my leftah, I almost forgot, oranges and apples; check.
My heart was pounding so hard as if Mjolnir; Thor’s hammer; was inside my chest beating it open. I can also feel that my sweat was now running cold. I looked at both of my hands and to my surprise, it was involuntarily shaking. I know I don’t have any Parkinson’s disease, I am just nervous. Then I clasped my shaking hands and it was cold as a dead body.
Ah, crud! What’s happening!
I gripped both of my hands until the shaking stopped. Then I closed my eyes and asked my Maker for help and to give me the strength to face her with pure bravery and courage. As I opened my eyes, I brought out my ID and entered the premises of the University and began my search of my love’s room.
I went to the Science Building specifically at the back where her classroom was. At my first attempt of looking for her, I failed. But that did not stop me for looking for my duchess. I again went on and looked for her but still I can’t find her.
Filled with grief, I went in front of the CTE office and texted her where she was. I then sat at the nearby stairs and waited for her answer. My phone then began to vibrate. I took it out and when I looked at my phone, it was her! She gave me the right number of her classroom. My heart was then ignited again with determination. I thought all hope was gone and I would not be able to see her.
As I stood up, chaos lit up. The bell rang its annoying sound and suddenly, the doors of classrooms flung open! Students came flooding on the corridor and in a split second, I was trapped at the middle of the hallway. I tried to avoid every living thing that was on the way but I couldn’t. I can smell any kind of scent in there. Some were too sweet like a newly opened candy while some has this sour odor and you do not want to know where it came from.
While I was trying to free myself from the aggravating crowd, suddenly, someone stepped on my foot. The pain ran around my left foot and I felt that I need to scream because of the current agony that I was having.
Why now? Ahhh! Does this freak now where he is going! Curse you freaking human and may you never see your children!
I then regained my composure and proceeded at the back of the Science Building and searched for her. In an instant I found the room on where she was. As I opened the door, I saw her and my world slowly turned.
She was wearing her FS 5 uniform and black doll shoes. She turns her head to my direction in the most graceful manner I could think of. As she stares at me, her stunning eyes captivated me and it was, somehow, telling me to come near her. She then gave me her sweet smile that always leaves me captivated and would even remain on my dreams for the night. She then stood up and went my way.
“So, uh… uhm, h-how was s-s-scho-school?” I stammered.
“It was fine,” she smiled, “how about you?”
“Uh, i-it was g-gr-great,” I replied while I also give my smile. Actually it is really awesome because I saw you again and you completed my day! Oh joy!
“Oh, okay,” she uttered in the most angelic way, “so the tickets?”
Oh, yes the tickets, I almost forgot, I thought as I grinned.
She went back to her seat and opened her black shoulder bag. As I wait for her, some of her classmates were already coming in. The others that were coming in were looking at me and they were assessing me from head to toe.
Okay! Here we go again! Nope! I am not saying it. Not even here.
Before I could finish my thought, she was back and was holding this card-like thing. It was the ticket from the concert she was talking about. She then handed it over to me while I take my wallet from my back pocket to get my payment for the ticket. As I gave it to her, I remembered immediately that I was supposed to give her something. Before she could return from her seat, I took the urge to confront her. I cleared my throat and then tried to arrange my thoughts in order.
“Uh… Ha-Han-Hannah,” I again stammered, “I w-was going t-t-to give you s-so-something.”
She just gave me a slight confusing facial expression but let me proceed to what I am saying.
“I-I ho-hope y-you like i-it,” I said, still with a trace of nervousness.
I opened my hard bound notebook and there lies my two letters for her. One was folded in the most beautiful manner I can and is in a baby blue paper with a pleasant smell. There’s also a white-peach ribbon that sealed the letter and it contains my love letter to her. The other one is also a baby blue paper and where my poem is written. It is sealed with a red ribbon with whit linings at the edge. I took it and I can feel the smoothness of the paper and the enchanting perfume it has traveled under my nose. I gave my most handsome smile as I handed it over to her. Before I could forget, I took the plastic bag of fruits and gave it to her.
“What is this?” she asked with confusion.
“R-read i-i-it and you wi-will know,” I replied stuttering.
She took the letters but refused to take all the fruits that were in the bag. I tried to insist that she should take the fruits for she is not feeling well but still she didn’t take it. Being a gentleman, I respected her decision and waved my goodbye to her.
As I left the grounds of the school, my heart was pounding with joy and happiness! I felt that I was the happiest man in the whole world!
At last! I told myself. At last it is done! I only need to wait for her answer! I hope she likes the poem and the love letter!
A walked down the pavement of Session Road and my heart was filled with overwhelming joy that I haven’t felt in a very long time. My smile was reaching to my ears and I felt like I was The Joker. At that moment, dancing and singing was the only thing that is needed on that moment.
I have returned home safely. As I opened the door, my mother greeted me. I smiled back and went to my room to change. I placed my stuff back to my shelf and stared at my hands again. This time it is in normal condition, it is not shaking and has the normal temperature of an average human being. I went out to my room and plugged my phone to charge. Before I could leave my phone alone, it again gave a slight pulse like it always does. I gave a slight look at my phone and to my surprise, it was Hannah!
I quickly opened the message and was hoping it would be positive. My heart again began to pound but this time, I can’t feel the Mjolnir on my chest, it was a jackhammer striking on my fragile heart. Again, my hand went freezing and began to tremble.
At last! I opened the message. My eyes traveled to every written word on it. My smile was again reaching to my deepest sides of my ears. But as I finish on reading it, slowly, my smile began to fade. My heart fell from its great height and shattered from the concrete ground. My eyes were then filled with tears moreover I felt the jackhammer inside my chest turned into a chainsaw and ravaged my defenseless heart.
I turned to my left and saw my brother browsing his FB from his phone. I do not want to let him know on what is happening. Then I twist my head to my left and saw my mother cooking a very delicious meal for our dinner. I do not want her also to know on what happened to me. I slowly closed my eyes and tried hold my tears.
After a few moments, my tears were held back and felt that I need to release it. I left my phone beside next to our radio, went to the post where I usually punch, and stance in a boxing formation, ready to destroy my fist.
As I was punching the concrete post, my brother noticed that I was acting a little bit weird. He stood up and went to me and asked me.
“What the hell is wrong with you?”
“It is none of your damn business,” I replied to him as I looked at him, trying to hide my despair.
“Okay,” he said as he goes back to the couch, “whatever, bro!”
I continued punching the post and asked myself on what went wrong.
Why? I asked myself, why now? Why me? This always happens to me! I am really gettin’ tired of this cycle! I would fall in love to with someone then I would court her and then following to that she would somehow give me a chance and after a few months, that same woman would break my heart. I am tired of this! I slammed my fist on the solid wall. It did hurt but it is still no match on the pain I am having right now.
Our mother called us for dinner. I sat on my usual place. The chair was dead cold and I can feel it creep straight to my shattered heart. Everybody in the house can see that I am doing well, but I am not. Inside of me, I feel I am bleeding seriously. There is a huge wound that had been inflicted inside of me and I do not know on how to treat it. I am a soldier left in the battlefield ready to die. A hero that had been defeated for the first time by his villain. A lover that left under a stormy night and nowhere to go.
The night passed by and dinner was over. I did the usual, helped inside the house and did my chores. I opened my Facebook account and was hoping to suppress my emotions by making myself laugh. I did! But I can still feel the wound that had been made moments back.
As my eyes grew weary on looking around my account; at a snail’s pace; I stood up and went to my room. I crawled under my sheets and knocked my head over my soft pillow. I smudged my face as I smell the odorless pillow. I tightly hugged the cushion in there and began to stare at my pitch black quarters. Slowly, my eyes became weary and went to close by itself. Then, out of nowhere, tears slowly rolled over my cheeks.
This is the day that the world stopped turning.